Mentor: You have lovely handwriting! You could be a professional calligraphist.
Student: This chicken scratch? No one would ever want me.
Mentor: All I can do is give you the flowers - it’s up to you to water them or not.
- Be generous with your compliments. Kindness is free. Everyone has at least one talent, skill, aspect, or quirk to recommend themselves to the world. Find that thing and recognize it - it’s that easy. Tip: specific, personalized compliments tend to be most meaningful.
- And if making people feel better doesn’t appeal to you, scientific studies have shown the power of compliments to improve personal wellness and increase influence in social and business circles.
- Scientists have found that being paid a compliment actually lights up the same parts of our brains that get activated when you get paid a monetary award.
- Remember the Golden Rule of communications: “They won’t remember what you say, only how you make them feel.”
A Simple Compliment Can Make a Big Difference
There is ample evidence that giving someone else a boost, whether giving compliments or expressing gratitude, has a mood-lifting effect and contributes to well-being. But we often hold back, unnecessarily, because we aren't well calibrated to the actual effects our positive messages have on others.