How to give a compliment

Mentor: You have lovely handwriting! You could be a professional calligraphist.

Student: This chicken scratch? No one would ever want me.

Mentor: All I can do is give you the flowers - it’s up to you to water them or not.

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• Be generous with your compliments. Kindness is free. Everyone has at least one talent, skill, aspect, or quirk to recommend themselves to the world. Find that thing and recognize it - it’s that easy. Tip: specific, personalized compliments tend to be most meaningful.
• And if making people feel better doesn’t appeal to you, scientific studies have shown the power of compliments to improve personal wellness and increase influence in social and business circles.
• Scientists have found that being paid a compliment actually lights up the same parts of our brains that get activated when you get paid a monetary award.
• Remember the Golden Rule of communications: “They won’t remember what you say, only how you make them feel.”

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Further Reading

A Simple Compliment Can Make a Big Difference

There is ample evidence that giving someone else a boost, whether giving compliments or expressing gratitude, has a mood-lifting effect and contributes to well-being. But we often hold back, unnecessarily, because we aren't well calibrated to the actual effects our positive messages have on others.

hbr.org

Not all compliments land the same. Here's how to get better giving them.

Your haircut looks great. Your speech was so moving. You are a really good friend; I can't tell you how great it was to talk last week when I was upset. Compliments make us feel good - both giving and receiving them.

www.nbcnews.com

The Big Freaking List of Compliments