How to Apologize for Something Outside of Your Control

It's not really your fault, right?

Start Here

• You’ve found yourself in the unenviable position of a rock and a hard place. Now, you have to tell the rock (or the hard place) that you can’t do what they want you to do.

• There are many reasons why you may not be able to do what they want:

  • It’s against policy

  • It’s against the law

  • It’s against the law of physics

  • Natural disasters

  • Lack of skills or tools

  • Lack of stock

  • Whims of fate

  • Unnatural disasters

• Here’s the cold hard truth: They usually don’t care about the why. That’s not to say it isn’t important, but this conversation requires the proper framing so that it doesn’t come across as you telling them, “Not my fault, not my problem.”

• Acknowledging their concern is the most important part of the apology.

• Offer a brief explanation, but focus on the things inside your (and their) control.

Talking Points

• Dear <Name>, I’m sorry to have to tell you that due to <the thing outside of your control>, I can not/no longer <impact to them>.

• I know this is not ideal, and I understand any frustration you feel.

• Even though I may not be able to <one-liner of the thing outside your control>, what I can do for you is <description of what you can do for them>.

• Even though I may not be able to <one-liner of the thing outside your control>, I encourage you to <description of what they can do>.

• <Offer additional details about what you can do for them (discounts, free trial, replacement product, bottle of wine, another person to do the job, etc.)>

• Thank you for understanding.